Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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