i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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