Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
operation have a gay friend backfired
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
