its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Is Oprah even human
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
