Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
