Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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