im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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