Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
