I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize