How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize