I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize