Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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