Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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