My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
