More tranny stories later!
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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