best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
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