Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
well you can't waste a boner
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
