Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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