I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize