I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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