Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize