If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
