you would pick up someone in the library
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize