omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
We need to get me chipped asap
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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