Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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