I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Randomize
