I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
