Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize