he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I have fence marks all over my body
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
