Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
My pussy is not your playground.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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