You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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