we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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