You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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