therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize