It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize