On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
