chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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