Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
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