In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
