Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
