The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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