hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
