As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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