Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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