he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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