I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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