YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize