wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
they're like a gay fantastic four
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
