i don't like sucking hair
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
