I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
