I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
